Dare To Be Stupid

The greeting card industry and other retailers have aligned over the past decades. Along with their mountains of merchandise they drive us to consume they have also yielded an interesting by-product, manufactured holidays. Now I'm not talking the good, day off from work, kind of holidays here. I'm talking the "You should buy someone a card because it's such a day" holidays.

There are days for pretty much everyone who wants one and if not, just contact them and they'll fire up the presses and set you up. While this has driven consumption of these types of merchandise through the roof it has also put us guys in a precarious position of pretty much always having to remember some "holiday" or special day. Since we usually fail miserably at this I figured it was time we got our own day. Then while cruising I found a reference to Stupid Guy Thing Day.

This single day may be responsible for spawning the likes of the the "Tomatina" tomato fights in Spain and a great many other pointless events. Hey, it's what we do best. How many of you haven't found yourselves shaking your head at guys when they get going. In general most guys when alone or in very small groups they aren't usually too dangerous (I choose another path myself). It's when we begin to congregate that the real fun starts.

Why do we feel the need to outdo one another? Why do we find farts so damn funny? What drives us to perform foolish acts that will endanger our lives and general well being for a laugh? We're guys! We jump off of things for fun. We'll try to outdrink each other, outbelch each other, outplay each other and generally perform strange and deranged acts because it keeps us sane. Pranks, pointless slapstick violence and mayhem are the calling cards we leave for the world. Think of all the exercise necks everywhere get with all the head shaking. We're doing our part for international fitness, honest.

It's a day for we stupid guys to be ourselves. Let us worship those other stupid guys that have carved a spot for us in the annals of history. Women will fear this event as it means more of guys being guys. I say keep them scared and push yourself to the top of your game fellas! So let's race downhill in shopping carts. Take a stupid bet for glory and be that dumb little kid you really want to be but society won't let you be. Just make sure you have some of the guys with you or warn them what you're up to.

Someone has to be around to make bail.