Tuesday, January 24, 2006

Don't mess with the snowman!

That'll learn ya!
Lost in the shuffle and the chaos of the election mayhem was a poor beleaguered holiday known to few. Yes folks that right, it was National Snowplow Hockey Mailbox Day. This is a specialized twist on the old redneck game of mailbox baseball, with a Canadian twist. In my checkered past I had the pleasure of plowing a few parking lots for a landscaper friend when the weather got mental. The trucks themselves were parked out in the boonies and as such this enabled a little "hockey" on the way to a job site.

To be honest I never actually plowed any mailboxes, but we had two others who actually plowed items other than snow. One took many a mailbox out while scrambling around the cab to find his dropped cellphone. As he swerved around, the only thing stopping his day from getting really ugly was the snow, as this effectively removed all person shaped targets as well as vehicular victims from his path. The good thing about the mailboxes are the remarkably loud snapping sound that let him know he was about to go off the road.

And the winner is.....The blue ribbon actually goes to the guy that drove his truck through a railing that he said he didn't know was there. Now at the back of this particular mall, there wasn't a single person-door that didn't have a step, with a railing, leading up to it, yet he still decided to try to plow the entire step away with the snow. The resulting damage to the railing, and cracks to the plow frame were astonishing. I never knew the steel, when subjected to enough sudden force in extreme cold, can shatter like glass. He even bent the truck frame!

I did no damage, unless you count the fools who had left their vehicles in the snow instead of paying to park in the adjacent lot. Their cars were, unharmed, but definitely trapped in their little 5 foot tall cocoon of snow. I only wish I could have been there to see their faces when they came back the next day to get their cars. Don't feel bad for these people as there were signs stating that the area was a snow removal zone and that all cars had to be out by 11:00pm. Let it also be known that the nearest residential area were a good 1 hour walk away, and that these were the same 4 cars that were always parked there, regardless of the weather. Two of which I kow were warned by the property manager.

Sure we could have had them towed, but then they would have to pay the impound fee to free their car. I preferred to help them save a buck or two by avoiding the impound charges, and any gas they would have burned before the thaw. See, I'm a nice guy! Don't mess with the plow drivers people, they have a hard enough day without your "help". They also have the advantage of by-laws and really, really big equipment.


Blogger Stacy The Peanut Queen said...

5 foot tall cocoon of snow????!! I got cold chills just reading that! Brrrrr!

8:15:00 AM  
Blogger Hick said...

When I lived in Milwaukee (2 1/2 winters was all I could take), I used to laugh at the people running out to their cars when they heard the snowplow coming and they were parked on the wrong side of the street. Some made it out safely and...well, let's just say the the others got to know their shovel intimately.

9:44:00 AM  
Blogger sands of time said...

What i want to know is why the snow plow drivers always block my driveway? what have i done to them?

11:07:00 AM  
Blogger Rowan said...

never knew that this "holiday" existed. hmm, how educating...hehehe

11:48:00 AM  
Blogger Martini said...

When the mall parking lot was full, and people began to park illegally on sidewalks and such, I would park my Jeep YJ halfway up a snowpile, or climb over it, to the little valley in the middle, where no one else could reach. Thanks for being one of the guys that offered me exclusive parking!

1:30:00 PM  
Blogger Cody said...

I am so glad it has only snowed like once here in Kansas....

1:54:00 PM  
Blogger Gimpy Mumpy said...

We were snowed in yesterday too, but fortunately for me my brother plows our road and driveway. Today was bright and sunny though :)

7:04:00 PM  
Blogger Memphis Steve said...

Snowplow hockey? I wanna play!

11:49:00 PM  
Blogger Denny Shane said...

I was going to congratulate you on your blue ribbon award. Glad I read the blog first.

9:10:00 AM  
Blogger Martini said...

We haven't had snow in Canada for weeks and weeks! When will this craziness end - with a blizzard?

1:38:00 PM  
Blogger Laura said...

I love the snow plows. We used to build forts in our ditch after the snow plow went by. It was a ready-made igloo.

2:50:00 PM  

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